In continuation of the topic titled “Children’s Rights on Parents”, we shall focus on some other rights of the children on their parents in this part.
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Treating All the Children Equally:
The Prophet (PBUH&HP) has emphasized that parents should be just and fair to all their children, particularly in matters of gifts and kindness, and it must not be that while one gets more the other gets less or nothing.
Besides, if discrimination is made among the children and one is favoured more than the other, it will lead to ill will and jealousy, and nothing but evil can arise from this. This child who is discriminated against will bear a grudge against the father, the painful consequences of which are easy to imagine.
Moman ibn Bashir narrates: My father took me to the Prophet (PBUH&HP) and said to him: I have given a slave to this son of mine. The Prophet inquired, have you given the same to all of your sons? No, my father replied. The Prophet, thereupon, said: It is not correct. Take it back. In another version, the same narration, the Prophet asked: do you want all your children to be equally devoted to you?
Yes, of course, he replied. The Prophet said: Then do not act like that (let it not be that you give some property to one child and exclude the others.) In yet another version it is added that the Prophet remarked: I cannot be a witness to an act of injustice.
In this version, it is enjoined upon parents not to discriminate among their children when it comes to giving them something as a gift, etc. This has been condemned by the Prophet (PBUH&HP) as unjust and unfair.
Some of the learned people have gone to the extent of calling it Forbidden (Haraam), but the majority of them hold the view that though it is not Haraam, it is Undesirable (makruh).
It must, however, be emphasized that the command applied only to a situation where the preferential treatment is based on a consideration that is not lawful or justifiable in the eye of the Shariah otherwise no blame will be attached to it.
For example, if a child is physically handicapped and cannot earn his livelihood like his brothers, a special favour to him will not be incorrect, but to an extent, it will be essential and worthy of Divine reward, Similarly, should any child dedicate himself to the cause of Imaan or public welfare and have no time to look after his economic needs, it would also be correct and deserving of reward, to make a reasonable allowance for him over the other children.
There is no harm if the preference is shown to one of the children with the consent of others (i.e., brother and sisters). In a version, the Prophet (PBUH&HP) says: Treat all your children equally in regard to free gifts. If I were to show preference in this matter, I would show it to my daughters. (If equality was not necessary and binding, I would have declared that more be given to daughters than to sons.)
It can be concluded from this version that though, after the death of the parents, the shares of daughters in ancestral property is half of the sons, in their lifetime, the share of both the sons and the daughters is equal. Therefore, whatever the parents give to the sons, in their lifetime, should also be given to the daughters.
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Responsibility of Marriage
It is the duty of parents to arrange the marriage of their children when they come of age. The Prophet (PBUH&HP) has stressed that it should be taken seriously and with a full sense of responsibility.
Abu Saeed Khudri and Abdullah ibn Abbas narrated that the Prophet (PBUH&HP) said: Whoever is blessed by the Creator with children should give them good names, a good training, teach them good manners, and arrange for their marriage when they attain the age of puberty.
If he does not pay due heed to it and fails to get them married, on reaching marriageable age (due to negligence) and they take no ways that are forbidden, the father will be held responsible for it.
Commentary: In this version, the marriage of the children, too, on their attaining the marriageable age, has been made a responsibility of the father. But alas we are growing increasingly indifferent to it mainly because we have made marriage a most tiresome and expensive affair by following and adopting the customs of others.
If we follow a good example of the Prophet (PBUH&HP) and begin to perform marriages as he had performed his own marriage; or the marriages of his daughters, the whole ceremony will be as easy and simple, as it is for a Muslim to observe and fulfil the Friday Prayers. Blessings will then flow from it – of which we have deprived ourselves, through thoughtless imitations of un-Islamic societies.
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Cleanliness and Hygiene in the Family Structure
For Almighty Allah loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean. (1) Once the marriage takes place and the young couple starts their mutual life with love and affection, they must attend to basic issues in life, and seriously avoid any indifference or sluggishness in this regard. One of these basic issues is cleanliness and hygiene in all aspects of life.
We must pay close attention to the cleanliness and hygiene of our body, hair, mouth and teeth, clothing, floor covering, living accommodations especially kitchen appliances and dishes and whatever is related to everyday life. Some young couples only suffice to eating, drinking, and apparent leisure and ignore cleanliness and hygiene early in their mutual life.
There is no sign of orderliness, discipline or cleanliness in their life. Not only is this ignorance not acceptable by our healthy nature, our mind or our divine religion, but it is also seriously despised.
This may also become dominant in life through the passage of time and may threaten the health of the family, both physically and mentally. It may also have grave consequences on the children, and turn them into indifferent, dumb, ill, weak, oppressive, and burdensome individuals. They may get used to various sins and corruption.
Almighty Allah the Benevolent Has announced His love and affection for those who attend to hygiene and their cleanliness and keep their bodies and souls free of all impurities. For Almighty Allah loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean. (2)
Islam is manifested through the Holy Quran, the sayings of the noble Prophet (PBUH&HP) and his household are the Immaculate Imams. The rules of hygiene of this divine school exceed five thousand.
They are partly presented in volumes one and two of Vasa’il al-Shiia. They are superior to all rules of hygiene and are extremely wonderful in that they are delicate and encouraging ones to abide by. Nearly fifteen agents have been introduced as cleansing agents in Islam.
This is not observed in any other existing school of thought. Islam has forbidden polluting; being polluted or causing pollution in many respects. The one who pollutes is considered a wrong-doer and deserves divine retribution on the Day of Judgment.
Either of the following can be used to clean in different situations: flowing water; well-water; spring water; rainwater; stale water in a volume each of its sides being nearly three and a half feet; a small amount of water being poured on a filthy object sufficient to cleanse it; dust-covered earth; direct sun-light; fire; change of state or form from one to another.
In several important traditions, the Prophet (PBUH&HP) has stressed on the value of purity and cleanliness in such a way that it seems to be one of the surprising Islamic issues to any intellectual.
Cleanliness is half of faith. (3) The first thing that is considered in the Hereafter is cleanliness. (4) The Prophet (PBUH&HP) was extremely sensitive to the issue of oral and dental hygiene, cleaning hair and face, clothes and furniture, lanes and streets and even the dead.
He was also superior to all in following hygienic rules and cleanliness. He ordered the dead to be washed with lotus and camphor water. Also, he ordered that camphor be placed on the forehead where we prostrate to worship Almighty Allah.
In addition, he ordered the grave to be dug deeper and to be careful in placing a stone above the head and a little bit distant from it, and to throw dust over the dead body in an orderly fashion.
Thus, the body, the camphor, and the dust will disintegrate and combine together in such a way as to maintain the health of citizens. These decrees are amazing ones and show the greatness of that noble Prophet’s knowledge and wisdom.
The Immaculate Imam Ali’s (PBUH) knowledge and wisdom are manifestations of Almighty Allah’s knowledge and wisdom. The Prophet (PBUH&HP) was so pure and clean that Imam Ali (PBUH) introduced him as the cleanest and the purest and asked all the people of the world to use the Prophet (PBUH&HP) as a model for cleanliness and purity of body and soul.
Follow the example of your Prophet who is the cleanest and purest creature in existence. In fact, he is a model for anyone who wishes to follow him in all issues related to living. (5)
The Prophet (PBUH&HP) said: In fact, Almighty Allah is pure, He likes the pure. He is clean, He likes the clean. (6) See how important cleaning is that there is a mention of it in Almighty Allah’s presence.
The Commander of the Faithful (PBUH) said: Wash yourselves free of any bad, disturbing odours with water, and be responsible for yourself. In fact, Almighty Allah the Almighty is angry with those who are so filthy that others do not like their company. (7) The Prophet (PBUH&HP) said: Clean your body, Almighty Allah will clean you.
In fact, there is no one who spends the night clean and is not accompanied by an angel. And no hour of the night is passed without the angel saying: O Almighty Allah, please forgive your servant since he spent the night while being clean. (8) The Prophet (PBUH&HP) said: The human body is filthy. (9) He also said: Filthy people perish. (10)
Jaber, the son of Abdullah Ansari has been narrated as saying: The Prophet (PBUH&HP) saw a man with badly dishevelled hair. He asked him: Did he not find anything to comb his hair with? He saw another person with filthy clothes. He shouted: Did he not find any water to wash his clothes? (11) Imam Baqir (PBUH) said: Sweeping your houses will eliminate poverty. (12)
The sixth Imam(PBUH) said: Washing the dishes and sweeping your courtyards will increase your daily bread. (13) The Commander of the Faithful Imam Ali (PBUH) said: Do not collect the trash outside your house since it is a source of evil. (14) It is wonderful that the divine viewpoint of the Prophet (PBUH&HP) and the Imams informed the people about microbes centuries before their discovery.
The Prophet (PBUH&HP) said: Do not leave the unusable food leftovers at home overnight and take them out of the house in broad daylight. In fact, these unusable leftovers are a source of evil. (15) He also said: Attend to cleaning with all your strength, since Almighty Allah the Almighty has established Islam on cleanliness. No one shall enter Heaven, but the clean. (16)
Imam Reza (PBUH) said: Cleanliness is one of the attributes of divine Prophets. (17) The Prophet (PBUH&HP) told Ayesheh: Wash these two robes. Are you not aware that our clothes worship Almighty Allah as long as they are clean and will stop doing so once they become dirty? (18)
Considering the verses of the Quran regarding cleanliness and cleansing agents, Almighty Allah’s love of cleanliness and purity, and many traditions in this regard, it is the duty of the members of the family to clean their body and clothes, the furniture and the house as much as they can.
As the Quran has recommended mutual cooperation based on kindness and piety, the man should help his wife with cleaning. Women are morally bound to clean the house, the furniture and clothes to please their husbands and Almighty Allah.
This will also guarantee the family’s health and will defeat pain, illness, distress and suffering. Housewives should remember that working at home to provide for the family’s comfort is a form of worship and it certainly has a divine reward.
Continued on the next article: http://Children’s Rights on Parents 3
NOTES:
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- Holy Quran Baqara 2:222.
- Ibid.
- Mizan al-Hikmat, v.5, p.558.
- Ibid
- Nahj ul-Balaghah, Sermon 160.
- Mizan al-Hikmat, v.10, p.92.
- Ibid
- Ibid
- Ibid
- Ibid
- Ibid
- Mizan al-Hikmat, v.10, p.93.
- Ibid
- Ibid
- Mizan al-Hikmat, v.10, p.95
- Ibid
- Ibid
- Mizan al-Hikmat, v.10, p.94
